Months ago I bought tickets to this music festival in Jersey. When I bought the tickets it was every band I could possibly want to see (minus about 4) now some of these bands have dropped out. But still some great bands…MUSE, Jack’s Mannequin, Say Anything, etc etc. No dilemma there........ I am still excited!!
Well I also work one day a week at Alma.
Which is a restaurant, but not just a restaurant, it the restaurant that is part of my bar. My cheers bar where everyone (or most people) know my name. I got a job from my ‘friends’ but there they are my managers….no lines shall be crossed (except none of the lines are that clear anyways).
Well I ended up on my normal Saturday night shift… but I can’t be both in Jersey and Brooklyn at the same time. I think no big deal. I have covered some other people…I can find someone to switch a shift with me.
I called everyone I knew plus some people form last season who I didn’t know. And no one could work for me. Doesn’t seem like a big deal I know. But as the week was growing to an end I was totally loosing sleep over this. I was even getting creative paying for this person’s babysitter and that person’s taxi etc etc. Nothing was working. I found myself staring in the mirror asking which person am I: the girl who screws over her friend that bought ticket to go the festival with her months ago or the girl who screws of her managers ‘friends’ and bails on her Saturday night cinco de mayo shift at the Mexican restaurant. I was really fucking torn. I couldn’t find either of those people in the mirror….but the week was passing and I had to be one. It was very dramatic….I was even scheming up how I would avoid seeing people in my neighborhood for the last 4 months that I live here(just out of shame for being that person – even though I told them I wasn’t going to show up) And that was a horrible feeling, but my friend that I am going to the concert with has been there for me in so many ways….how could I bail on her? Sounds ridiculous but it was killing me…..
Luckily, Joe… Good old Joe, who I don’t even know lost my number but called the restaurant and told them he would work for me. AND now I am going to rock out without any self loathing…….
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