Periods....

That is how I can divide my life…not the shedding tissue bloody kind of period but period as in a dot....... that marks the end of something and the beginning of something else…often related but still not the same. Periods separated by phrases that are repeatedly said to me by different people. Unrelated people. People who don’t know that they are helping to mark a section in my life.

For a long time people were constantly telling me not to take things so seriously…. I would hear that all the time about EVERTHING from my reaction to a movie or tv show to political opinions or things at work. And frankly it would really piss me off because I felt this comment undermined and dismissed the validity of my thoughts, feelings, and opinions. There was a time when I even felt isolated….no one else feels this serious about things.

But I realized the other day that phrase has been replaced. I don’t think it’s because I don’t take things so seriously, but I think that how I express that seriousness has changed. So I guess I should thank all those people who used to repeatedly say that to me.


Start new section.


New phrase.



Not sure how I feel about this one.





In regards to my expectations and standards for everything: the friendliness of the person selling me coffee, the people I work with, the people I meet…and on and on.
I have repeatedly been told (once again but unrelated, unsuspecting people) that I need to lower my standards. When I am told this I don’t feel pissed off, but I do sort of feel this glimmer of hopelessness. Come on! My standards are not that high…if I have to lower them I feel like we must live in truly hopeless world….and what do we do next if that is really the case?

So for now I am not going to lower them, which will lead to a lot of disappointment, but won’t that make the times they are met just that much more rewarding?

i.e. Ben Gibbard solo show : AMAZING – my standards totally met.


(and this counts for this Saturday.... i don't care who says what or that that only one women has ever finshed or that most people don't finish their first try...I expect myself to be able to hike all 50 miles...)